“What’s Normal?” Blog #37

It was a normal day and everyone was going to work on a beautiful sunny morning.

The city was filled with noise and people looking forward to a normal September day.

In the blink of an eye, the Twin Towers came crashing down in fiery flames and

thousands of people last their lives. Their normal day was changed to disaster in a

heartbeat forevermore. On a hot December 26, 2004 morning, half way around the

world out of the blue, the biggest Tsunami to hit the Indian Ocean destroyed coastal

vacation spots forevermore. This killed more than 250,000 people. This changed lives

from normalcy to never-ending sadness. It was a hot July morning and I was not going

to be late for my Floor Duty scheduled this Tuesday. When I arrived at my office, I stood

in front of my desk staring down at the quote on my daily calendar, “Oh normal day, let

me be aware of what a treasure you are”.

One hour later, my Mother was brutally murdered by a drug addict and my normal life

was changed forever more. What insurance policy do we have on the “Unexpected

changing our Normal Day to chaos”?

Everything that happens to us affects our sense of normal day in and day out. I believe

unless we take stock of every day habits, daily thoughts and daily actions, what we

consider to be “normal”, just may be our demise. A slippery slope exists when it comes

to our emotions. We must deal with decisions, judgement and reality with a clear head.

This is why every day I pray for discipline, detachment and discernment to see clearly.

Sometimes we cancel relationships for a lifetime, based on terrible words, or one

sad incident. We can lose family member relationships based on our judgement of how

we expect others to “normally behave” around us. Why be upset over things that are

out of our control? A stigma has attached itself to society. It is constantly pulling at all

of us. Invading our lives, it tries to get us to “see normal” through foggy, haze colored

glasses of artificial help.. There are commercials everywhere talking up the importance

of any and every kind of drug “just to get through each day”. One commercial goes like

this, “remember Big Lou, he’s like you, he’s on drugs too - Really? Well, that’s probably

right because the pharmaceutical companies are billionaires. And the numbers are

staggering. Now younger and younger people are believing this too.

More and more of us, in wanting to avoid dealing with any emotion, find a quick fix.

Try not to “Feel any thing” (This does not apply to medical reasons for intake).

The authentic feelings we have Inside are critical to our inner growth!

We need to use our moral compass to direct each one of our days.

By examining our feelings, we make amends where needed and remove regrets.

How many people alive, live life as though today were there last? Not many.

We take for granted what we feel is “normal acting, normal thinking and normal

behavior. From the advertisements on the air, to the movies we watch to the songs

we listen to. What do we see around us? A thick cloud of dysfunction is everywhere.

Where is the accountability? Do people address accountability in the youth today?

Speaking truth in every situation is healing. We need to be kind and tactful, yet

speak the truth. I believe this is the way to have a normal, healthy, happy life..

Sometimes we think why bother with a family member when their stubbornness is out

of our control? If we are worried, or unhappy or sad because of a family members

actions, speak the truth to them, yet remember we cannot change another heart. Be

careful though, are we “caretakers” or “caregivers”? It is not possible to fix others except

inside our own self. There is prayer and forgiveness and truth on our part. Then let go

because HE knows best. Truth is never hidden from an honest heart. However parents

need to do their part to speak truth and don’t be afraid to have an honest conversation

with your teen about serious issues.

IF this were the last day of any of our lives Would we look at life differently? Forgiveness

comes when we see others as we see ourselves. Every morning I wake up and thank the

Dear Lord for letting me see everyone I meet through HIS eyes only. We live in a society

saturated with signals telling us we “ need something to fix our day”. Rather why not tap

into the inner guidance of the Christ light inside us now.

It is not normal to want to numb or dull our senses daily, WE need to “feel our feelings”.

Our life becomes dangerous when we rationalize away the truth of our reality. We can’t

say I don’t care. What goes around comes around and it will catch up with each one of

us somewhere. We will only learn why we are here when we agree we need to “feel all

of our feelings” cold turkey. No getting high too avoid any emotion. No vaping, no

drugging, just plain feeling those feelings. Ask your teen if they do drugs to hide from

feelings in life. We all need to deal daily with a clear head, the following raw emotions of

sadness, regret, loneliness, anger, confusion, frustration, happiness, love, hate, sorrow

and of course the big one, “guilt”. Guilt for all or nothing at all, we have or haven’t done.

And its all okay. We are all in this together.

I promise you from the day I decided to avoid all drugs and liquor, my life has been

lighter, brighter and so much better. I don’t need to be high for any reason any more, no

matter what happens, nor do you. Trust me, this is truly a beautiful honest feeling of

freedom. Then and only then, can we learn about ourself and what we’ve came here to

do. Why are we alive? We are definately alive for a very specific reason and that

reason is to learn to love ourself unconditionally. A wise spiritual Guru once told me that

he walked into a bar years ago. Suddenly the wierdest thing happened to him. He

actually could “SEE” dark hovering energy spiraling down into the crown chakras of all

the people that were high or wasted on alcohol or whatever. He shared the

understanding of the old saying “Oh the Devil made me do it”. What does this mean?

It means we are not in control of our minds and bodies when we allow darkness to take

over. Do not give into temptation. We can do this one day at a time.

So today my normal day is not filled with dark drama or dysfunction. I want to be

authentic with a clear head. I see no need for drugs, alcohol or chemicals in my body to

“feel good”. What’s normal in the way I react to other people? I am now aware

everyone is on their own path, stuck or growing. I can only work on me! I am strong in

my faith and my belief in my Creator. Nothing can destroy this! My sense of self stems

from goodness and truth, and brings a normal balance into my choices of friendships.

I choose those around me to build me up, not tear me down. As we change lifestyles,

it’s important to only have healthy-minded people around us. I pray all our lives can

leave behind misplaced anger, regret and judgement. Everything that has happened to

each of us, makes us stronger. Hold on and believe it. With this approach we can have

a normal healthy balanced life. We can feel our faith, forgiveness & fortitude at work, as

we see those around us.

Remember this old saying, “there but for the grace of God, go I”.

So I wrap up tonight by asking, “How do you feel about what’s making your life normal

today?

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